A custody order (generally) clearly allocates parental rights and responsibilities. The parents who negotiate a custody order typically need to follow the schedule for parenting time included in a custody order and share decision-making authority according to the terms of the order.
Usually, parents who negotiate custody arrangements with one another and judges who draft custody orders try to create arrangements that can work for the family until the children turn 18. Despite those well-intentioned efforts, some families find themselves dealing with a custody order that doesn’t really work given their circumstances.
In some cases, parents may need to go back to court to modify a custody order. The following are some of the potentially benefits of updating a family’s division of parental rights and responsibilities.
Less need for on-demand compromise
One of the main benefits of an established custody order is that it limits the communication between the parents. They know when custody exchanges should occur and don’t have to constantly discuss when one parent gets to spend time with the children. If a custody arrangement does not work well with the family’s schedule, then the parents may end up regularly discussing the need to change exchange times or set up makeup parenting time. Modifying the custody order to reflect the current schedule for the family can diminish the need for those conversations and therefore the likelihood of conflict.
Predictability for the children
Children of all ages generally need structure to perform to the best of their abilities. When parents have to keep adjusting a custody order, the children may struggle with the unpredictability that follows. Having their weekends with one parent regularly interrupted or delayed can lead to frustrations for the children. They can also develop a sense of rejection if one parent regularly cancels their time with the children. Ensuring that the custody order makes parenting time predictable for the children can help them adjust to the new circumstances.
Allowing parents to secure childcare
Obtaining childcare services at the last minute when a co-parent cancels their time can be stressful and unnecessarily expensive. Parents may not be able to use their first choice for childcare services when making last-minute arrangements. An accurate custody order allows both parents to make arrangements for when they need family members or professionals to watch the children. Parents can control costs and limit the stress involved in last-minute arrangements by committing to a specific parenting schedule.
It is also worth noting that in some cases, adjusting a custody order to reflect a family’s actual division of parenting time can lead to a more reasonable arrangement for financial support as well. In some cases, parents may be able to cooperate with each other to modify an existing custody order. Other times, modifications involve litigation and family court. Understanding the potential benefits of updating a custody order can help parents find the motivation to broach the topic with a co-parent, when necessary.