Co-parenting after ending a romantic relationship with your child’s other parent can be a very difficult undertaking. Both adults have to be fully willing to work as a parenting team so the children can thrive.
One of the biggest issues that comes up in these situations is communication. Communicating effectively with your ex requires a thoughtful approach. Keeping the following tips in mind can help.
Commit to calm communication
Calm communication is one of the best things you can do for your children. It helps some parents think of communication in a business-like manner. If things get heated, you may need to take a step so you can think about the situation clearly.
Communicate directly with each other
Some parents try not to speak to each other, so they send messages through the children. This is never a good idea because it sets the stage for misinterpretation of messages. It also puts the children in a difficult spot because they may feel they have to choose sides. Instead, always communicate directly with each other, even if that has to be through texts or a parenting app.
Focus on your children
Always keep the focus on the children and what they need. It’s easy to fall into thinking about the things that ended the relationship, but that can work against you in a co-parenting situation.
Compromise as necessary
Co-parenting is based on parents working as a team so the children have what they need. There may be times when one parent asks to switch parenting with the other. If it won’t cause a major upheaval, making those swaps may work best for the children. Ultimately, the best interests of the children have to be the goal of every situation.
It’s always best to set a parenting plan up as quickly as possible when you separate. Working with a legal representative who can assist with this can reduce the stress associated with this consequential process and provide more stability for your children.